Exercise and me
I have been trying to get myself back into exercise mode for what now feel like years. It's not happening because so far I haven't been able to find anything I can enjoy.
Back when I was actually losing weight on this journey I ran, cycled, played wii like games and had the occasional zumba or burlesque class. I loved it all, looked forward to it all.
None of those things are doing it for me now. When I do force myself to do it I feel pleased about doing it when it's done but that's just it, I don't get the enjoyment of doing any more. I dread doing it, count the seconds until I can stop and yay. Just yay, it is done.
I realise I can't continue like this, and this time I am losing weight forever. I need to adjust my head. And what exercise means to me.
When I hit goal again I will need to continue to exercise, not let it whittle away into a distant memory. I used to be so good at this. In school I love P.E. I played netball for ten year and winning a lot. I played football, basketball, gaelic, tennis, badminton, there was a lot, as well as my beloved swimming. And I remember loving it, loving the competition as well as the sports themselves. Looking back it's like looking at a different person.
I know I need to find something and make it my routine to do, but for me to actually stick to that, I need to enjoy it. I just wish I could work out what it was.
I like running, but mostly just for the feeling of accomplishment I get at the end, and because it's been so long since I last ran properly I obviously can't do it any more, even to a bad standard let alone what I used to be capable of. I am trying to force myself back into this because of the satisfied feeling I get at the end but so far it's difficult.
Then there is cycling. I love cycling, it was something I've only really done as an adult. I had a bike as a kid but didn't ride much after about the age of seven. I love my bike too, it's the same colour as the bike I had as a kid and cycling is just fun.
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An old picture from when Gav and I went on a cycling adventure. |
- watching a cyclist get into a right turn only lane and then decide to drive straight on and then start screaming at the driver whose lane he just cycles into without looking around him.
- watching a cyclist trying to turn left onto a main road, the car behind him decided he wasn't going fast enough so overtakes.
The gym. I just don't care for them. I don't care for sharing machinery and often doubt the cleanliness of machines, I have my own treadmill and exercise bike anyway and those are the two machines I use most. If I join a gym it would be for the classes, but I then I'm not sure about my cash flow at the minute. So for now, that is out. I don't have a gym handy to me anyway.
I've been doing yoga recently, I used to do this a lot when I was a teenager and recently, it is the only thing I have enjoyed doing. Pure me time in my living room on my mat. Problem is that it isn't cardio.
And then there is walking, probably the only thing I enjoy doing, and I won't stop doing it. But I want to add something else to it. On a weekday I walk at least 4miles for activity points, that's how I am earning them at the minute. I'm not sure about weekends because I haven't measured the routes I take yet. I know I need to mix things up though.
I just honestly have no idea where I am with exercise any more. Other than knowing I need to find something I enjoy and place it firmly into my life.
What do you enjoy? Tweet me @sazzle182
I really really really want to be the kind of person who can exercise, but I cant do it. Much respect to you for even having a bike haha.
ReplyDeleteIs yoga helping you? Does it chill you out?
Below reply was meant to be to you x
DeleteI think it helps. But sometimes I wonder if it is a placebo effect. Cutting out alcohol (bar that half glass with you) I think has really helped too. Maybe a mix of both?
ReplyDelete